In Western culture, this script is well known. He lives at home, grows up, moves, gets a job, lives his own life as an adult, and occasionally sees his parents. But what if you don't want to follow that script? As society collapses around us, remaining in the warm bosom of family becomes more and more appealing. Perhaps you want to start a business without worrying that a potential partner will turn out to be a weirdo, avoid exorbitant rents without living with strangers, or maybe just pick up a check here and there. Maybe you want to explore the world with a lover without any guarantees. Or how about basking in the glow of maternal love as the world grows colder and colder. She introduces three mother-daughter couples who say that living, working, and traveling together has deepened their bonds and enriched their lives.
Ashley and Sherry travel together
Ashley Hassard, a 33-year-old teacher from Toronto, and her mother, Sherry Hassard, 73, retired, have been traveling the world together for the past five years, exploring their family roots.
ashley
“I lost my father suddenly. So suddenly. And if life has taught me anything, it's that nothing is certain, and you never know how much time you have. We don't really know what we'll be given, so we should make the most of the time we have, so when my mother said she wanted to spend time following our ancestors, I even questioned it. It didn't.
Since then, we have traveled the world, exploring our roots and discovering where we came from. From climbing glaciers in Iceland to sailing down the Danube River, it was one of the most eye-opening, humbling, and grateful experiences I've ever had. Last month, we got to enjoy his week-long pilgrimage to the final destination of our trip: Ireland, the place where Hassard's name began.
I feel like traveling with my mom reminds me to slow down a bit, take my time, and really stop and smell the roses. It was as much about the destination as it was about the moments in between. Traffic jams, car trips, layovers, and walks give us space and time to connect in ways that we don't often get in our normal daily lives.
It's one of the easiest and most authentic ways to connect, reconnect, and get to know each other again, and I'm so grateful for the opportunity to truly know my mother, not just know her as my mother. Masu is the first person to explore and experience this world. ”
sherry
“Our first trip was when Ashley was just a week old. My mom and I drove to South Carolina to visit relatives and introduce Ashley to everyone. Although it was a little ambitious to take such a long trip with a newborn and an older child, we were able to travel and it was a great way to start her journey. Through it all, we also traveled together to the United States, Dominican Republic, Mexico, Spain, Estonia, and Amsterdam.
Just recently, we decided to explore our heritage together. When she asked me where I wanted to go, there was no question, it was Iceland. My grandmother was born outside Reykjavík and moved to the Canadian prairies as a young woman. So I grew up dreaming of the place where her story was born. We seized the opportunity to return there when the situation improved again and it became safe after the pandemic. We immediately booked tickets to Hungary to find out where Ashley's father was born.
Travel enriches life. Some people do that with books, but I really don't think the experience of being immersed in another culture can be replicated. Being able to do something like this with my daughter is like an intergenerational education that not only helps us learn more about ourselves and our past, but also the next generation, what we needed to get. It also helps me develop a sense of true gratitude for everything, which is very satisfying. They are where they are now. ”
Jayashri and Sapna work together.
Sapna Shetty Heath, 50, of West St. Paul, Manitoba, and her mother, Jayashri Shetty, 73, created Jaya's Preserve, a seasoning company, to share the deliciousness of their family's recipes with foodies around the world. was established.
Sapna
“My relationship with my mother was not very good when I was a child. My parents were immigrants from India. My mother was very overprotective and strict with me, especially as a young mother. We are both quite stubborn, so we often argued and clashed.
My mother has been making spicy pickles since the early 1970s. I think it was a way for her to connect with her homeland, as she is far away from her family in India. She loved experimenting and pickling the fruits and vegetables she grew herself. Eventually, her spicy pickled carrots became a staple in her family. In 2017, I took early retirement from the federal civil service to stay home with my girlfriend's family, especially my daughter, who has Down syndrome. I became obsessed with making jam using all of our home grown rhubarb, sour cherries, grapes and apples and found ourselves making far more than we could eat ourselves. With encouragement from her family and friends, her mother and I decided to start selling her spicy carrot pickles and my jams and jellies. Today, we operate Jaya's Preserves, which features 10 varieties of South Indian spicy pickles and a wide variety of jams, jellies and marmalades. , all handcrafted in small batches using seasonal fruits and vegetables.
It's so meaningful because it really strengthens family ties and cultural bonds that are so easily broken today. We have built something together and it has truly been a labor of love for both of us. Working together gave us so much time to talk and make connections in ways that wouldn't have happened otherwise. I think we're really proud of what each other has accomplished. ”
Jayashri
“I thought she was too stubborn, but I didn't realize that I was just as stubborn as she was. I play games with my daughter, color and draw. I learned a lot from those experiences because I didn't have that opportunity when I was a kid and I got married in India at 16 so I feel like I missed out on my childhood. Masu.
Our relationship is now much better and we now live together in a multi-generational household. I feel lucky to have my daughter and her family so close. We still play games and go for walks together every day. We love going foraging together for wild blueberries in the summer or growing and harvesting them in our own gardens.
Working with my daughter allowed us to get to know each other on a different level and it was a great experience. My daughter pushed me outside of my comfort zone. That was difficult for me, as I don't really like change. I also like to be in control, so I had to take a step back and learn how to let go.
By working together, we were able to understand each other better, discover more about who she really was, and love her even more. ”
Micah and Elaine live together
Micah McLeish, 24, a flight attendant, and her mother Elaine Allen, 58, a customer service representative, have always lived together, except for a few years when Micah was away at school. They currently share a home in Toronto.
Mika
“As a child, my relationship with my mother was very close. She never went anywhere without me. I was basically joined at the hip from birth. My mother and I were It's still pretty much the same as we basically do everything together and run errands together. We still enjoy going out to eat at restaurants and helping each other with creative endeavors. I think we have become better friends.
I decided to move in with my mother because of the current economic situation and the fact that rent in Toronto is extremely high. I had to get used to the lack of personal space. My mom always barges into my room to show me her new TikTok or wakes me up at 8am. She's also like a roommate, and we're trying to figure out how to balance the responsibilities of living together while still keeping it a positive experience. It's completely different from when I was growing up because she was more of an authority figure and I was a kid, but now I'm an adult.
I consider my mother one of my best friends. Every day we get to know each other more and see things from each other's perspective. That's great, as opposed to my teenage years where we used to fight a lot.
She tells me a lot of the customs and traditions she grew up with. She is always teaching me new things like cooking, beauty, life skills, etc., which is very helpful as a young person trying to navigate her life as an adult. Living with her mother has enriched my life so much. ”
Irene
“As a stay-at-home mom, I have had the privilege of being present at every milestone and supporting Micah through every challenge. She is my only child, so I tried to give her every opportunity I could.
Our relationship now is good, we have open communication, and I enjoy being at home with her. We spend quality time together every time she comes back from her flight. We like exploring new brunch spots, taking our dogs to the dog park, and relaxing with each other at home.
She complains that she wants to live alone but doesn't have the financial means, so I guess I'm her backup option. Living with Micah as an adult required an adjustment period for both of us. It was strange to admit that she was an adult and had her own social life and plans. She makes a lot of choices, some of which I don't agree with, but she has to respect. I also accommodate her busy schedule as a flight attendant. This means that she is often away for long periods of time. This requires flexibility in routines and communication to keep her on the same page while she is away with her job.
Living together gives us countless opportunities to deepen our bonds and strengthen our relationships. Through shared experiences, open communication and mutual respect, we have cultivated a sense of understanding and trust. We have overcome good times and tough times, but it has strengthened our bond as a team. ”
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